So far, the journey into parenthood has been relatively easy. Breastfeeding, although demanding and time consuming, has been a breeze. Addie latched on like a champ and aside from a few clogged ducts, things have been going rather smoothly in the whole booby department (a HUGE plus that I'm sure many mommies can appreciate). She is happy and healthy and I have adapted to my new role as a mother effortlessly. The only issue that I have come across would have to be the one that dealt with putting my child to sleep. Seriously. From the very beginning, I have felt plain ole stupid when it comes to my girlie and bedtime.
As with any new venture in my life, I did my research to prepare. I read, "Babywise," along with countless online articles about baby sleep. I had opinions and ideas of what I wanted and I was ready... And then I had a baby who had a totally different plan. I knew that I wanted to feed on demand and was prepared to lose sleep because of this... But I also thought that my baby would be completely fine nestled in her little playpen that was placed right next to my bed.
As with any new venture in my life, I did my research to prepare. I read, "Babywise," along with countless online articles about baby sleep. I had opinions and ideas of what I wanted and I was ready... And then I had a baby who had a totally different plan. I knew that I wanted to feed on demand and was prepared to lose sleep because of this... But I also thought that my baby would be completely fine nestled in her little playpen that was placed right next to my bed.
Yeah. Right.
My sweet six pound baby wanted nothing to do with being on her own. I tried everything: would feed her until her little belly was full, swaddle, put a piece of my clothing in her bed, rock, sing, use a pacifier, didn't use a pacifier, tried gripe water, tried swaying, used sound machines, started a bedtime routine... And none of it worked. I would put my perfect little angel down and she would cry as if her whole world was falling apart and it broke my heart. All my resolve to "letting her cry it out" went out of the window (especially after my pediatrician said not to worry about it just yet because she was too little for it anyway).
And so we began to co-sleep. Now, I know that there are a TON of opinions on co-sleeping and a lot of them are negative. But, it's actually a lot more common than one would think and I think that most parents that co-sleep with their babies are quiet about it because they don't want to hear a horrific gasp, along with a, "Are you trying to kill your baby?!"
My sweet six pound baby wanted nothing to do with being on her own. I tried everything: would feed her until her little belly was full, swaddle, put a piece of my clothing in her bed, rock, sing, use a pacifier, didn't use a pacifier, tried gripe water, tried swaying, used sound machines, started a bedtime routine... And none of it worked. I would put my perfect little angel down and she would cry as if her whole world was falling apart and it broke my heart. All my resolve to "letting her cry it out" went out of the window (especially after my pediatrician said not to worry about it just yet because she was too little for it anyway).
And so we began to co-sleep. Now, I know that there are a TON of opinions on co-sleeping and a lot of them are negative. But, it's actually a lot more common than one would think and I think that most parents that co-sleep with their babies are quiet about it because they don't want to hear a horrific gasp, along with a, "Are you trying to kill your baby?!"
Obviously I am not.
I never felt that Adaline was in any danger. Joe was not very comfortable with this sleeping arrangement, so I had to be extra cautious with our positioning in the bed. It was not ideal but I quickly fell in love with it. First of all, both Addie and I were able to sleep and feel rested, one of the biggest complaints for new mommies. I laid on my side and fed her when she was hungry and we both got plenty of sleep. It made life super easy and I also felt that it was an amazing way to bond.
Our little sleeping situation was made even easier when the hubs left for a month and a halfu. Lots of bed space for me and the bébé! But, as the summer started coming to an end, I knew that things needed to change. Joe was about to come home and I am a firm believer that having a healthy marriage will be important in raising our healthy children... And let's face it, things get a little complicated when your kiddo is in the same bed. Also, Addie was beginning to roll over and even I knew that having her in our huge bed would not be safe when she rolled right off of it. I knew what I needed to do (get her to actually sleep in her own bed) but I didn't know how.
Our little sleeping situation was made even easier when the hubs left for a month and a halfu. Lots of bed space for me and the bébé! But, as the summer started coming to an end, I knew that things needed to change. Joe was about to come home and I am a firm believer that having a healthy marriage will be important in raising our healthy children... And let's face it, things get a little complicated when your kiddo is in the same bed. Also, Addie was beginning to roll over and even I knew that having her in our huge bed would not be safe when she rolled right off of it. I knew what I needed to do (get her to actually sleep in her own bed) but I didn't know how.
I started again with even more research, along with asking a few respected mommies their methods for getting their babies to sleep. One of the methods that I looked at was the Ferber method (which is even more controversial than co-sleeping) and one of the mom's that I used to babysit for said that this was actually what she had done and it worked perfectly.
For those that don't know, the Ferber method is also known as the "Crying it out" method. I was nervous about this and was so worried about totally screwing up my child. But, the more that I read about it, I found that it wasn't simply leaving your child to fend for themselves in their big, bad crib. It was gradually done and the child learns to teach herself soothing techniques, along with figuring out how to fall asleep on her own.
So, I made the resolution and decided to give us three days, the amount that it takes a baby to learn and accept a new habit (or so I have read).
The first night was hellllllllll. I started our bedtime routine, wrote down every exact thing that we did and the times that we did them, made sure she was drowsy, laid her down, and the worst night of my parenthood (thus far) began. I checked on her after the first three minutes, then waited five, then ten, and twelve and continued to check on her every twelve minutes after that. It took her 50 minutes of screaming and pitching a fit for her to fall asleep, only to wake up 30 minutes after and start it all over again.
Horrible.
She was a mess. I was a mess. And my poor husband was receiving calls from his crying wife who was certain that she was gonna screw up their kid.
Horrible.
But, like I said, I was determined to give it three days. Night 2 was a little easier and only took her 30 minutes of not-as-intense crying after following the exact same routine as the night before.
Night 3 was 15 minutes; Night 4 was 7 minutes; and Night 5 was an amazing 4 minutes.
I know that this isn't for everyone but when I was desperately trying to figure out how to sleep train my child, I wanted to know what worked and how to get there. If I could completely erase that first night, I would have. It was just so bad but after we got through it, things have been so much smoother. Addie is sleeping so much better on her own, as am I. She is not sleeping through the night just yet because I am still feeding on demand which I am certain will get better when we start adding solids to her diet. But, the child is sleeping from 7:00-11:30 and will wake about every two hours to eat after that.
Trust me... This is a HUGE step for us.
And, she is still incredibly wonderful and happy and I know that this will continue to get better!
That's it for today in the momma-hood! More to come later....
