27 Weeks: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Today is 27 weeks.  That means only one week left of the Second Trimester.  13 more weeks of this pregnancy!  91 days to go!  Two more field rotations for the Hubs and I!  We will celebrate: the arrival of my Bestie's baby, my sister's birthday, one of my godchild's birthday, the arrival of my cousin's baby, my Hubby's birthday, and our one year anniversary before sweet little Adaline Grace makes her debut. 

Am I excited?  You better believe it! 

I simply cannot believe that we have made it this far.  I think back to my fears and frustrations before we got pregnant and that seems so long ago.  And then I think about when we found out that we were expecting and how much I feared losing this precious, fragile happiness that we had gained.  And now here we are... so close to the end.  I pray, pray, pray that everything continues to go smoothly but with every little nudge from Adaline, I feel reassured that all is well with my sweet girl and that we will be meeting her very soon.

Pregnancy has been quite the experience for me.  There are many things that I miss about my pre-preggo life and many things that I will miss about being pregnant (I find this to be shocking!).  So, in celebration of the end of another trimester, here is my Pregnancy: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly List (I'll start with the bad and ugly first since I like to end things on a positive note).

The Bad and the Ugly (Things that I will NOT miss)

• The first trimester- I'm not sure if I've mentioned it before (ha!) but I HATED the first trimester.  I don't know who was happier to get through it... me or Joe.  I was tired and emotional and moody and sick the entire time.  And, it was truly amazing that by the end of the third month, my nausea and vomiting just disappeared, my energy returned, and I felt human again.  Simply amazing.
• Heartburn- I will take heartburn any day over throwing up but once the Second Trimester started, I have had the worst heartburn of my life.  And, the tricky thing is that it's not just certain foods that cause it (no, that would make life too easy).  It's ANYTHING.  I get heartburn from bread, from ice cream, from turning over in the middle of the night... Really, truly.  Our house has become Tum's Central.  There is a bottle of Tum's by my bed, by the sofa, in the kitchen, and in my purse.  Absolutely ridiculous.
• This body-  Sure, it was really cute and fun once the baby bump started to grow... but then it kept growing and growing and growing (along with my... ummm... let's say... "Ass"ets...). 
• First of all, I look back at the pictures when I wasn't 100% pleased with my body and the way that I looked.  I want to slap myself.  I am now 20 pounds heavier... and according to the books still have ten more to go... OMG.  That is not sexy.  God bless my husband for constantly telling me that he still thinks I am beautiful and sexy.  But, Lord help me, it is SO hard not to roll my eyes.
• Secondly, I am not one of those cute little ladies with the tiny body and the basketball baby belly (like my sister and my bestie... those bitches ;).  God gave me hips and I have always been a bit bootylicious... but NOW... I am booty-booty-bootylicious.  I guess on the bright side, I will have a place to set Addie when I get tired of holding her!
• WINE... and margaritas... and an ice-cold beer- I don't miss or feel the need to get trashed or completely drunk... BUT, I miss being able to share a good bottle of wine with my hubby... or going to a Mexican restaurant and ordering a margarita... or watching football with a beer so cold that there are little pieces of ice in it... Sigh.  Is it sad that it's 9:30 a.m. and my mouth is watering???
• Walking- I MISS RUNNING!!!  I know, I know.  I could have ran during the first two trimesters; but, when we first found out that we were pregnant, we were so scared of losing the baby.  The thought of all that bouncing and jiggling about made me so nervous that the baby would bounce right out of me!  So, I retired my running shoes for a bit.  I am dying to start up again and have already started looking for races in the Fall.  I'm ready to put in some miles!
• Typical pregnancy woes: Having to pee all of the time; having to use a forklift to get in and out of bed; shaving my legs while doing weird neck stretches; sitting and grunting simultaneously; backaches; maternity jeans; and weird pressure that just makes life so much more uncomfortable.   

The Good

• Seeing our baby for the first time- No matter how many pregnancy tests that I took that come out positive, it still felt surreal.  But then when I saw that little blob on the ultrasound and a heartbeat, my life was completely different.  I felt like for the first time in my life, I had truly witnessed a miracle.  Amazing.  
• Second trimester- This part of the pregnancy has been a dream and has definitely been the most fun!  Being pregnant and actually having the energy to enjoy it has totally renewed my faith in this whole baby making thing.  It has given me the confidence to think that I could possibly do this once or twice more... we'll see what third trimester and delivery do to that confidence!
• Finding out the sex of our baby-  Finding out Adaline was a girl and picking out her name has made everything seem that much more real.  Sharing this with my husband has been incredibly fun and exciting.  I love talking with him about who we think she will look like or the kind of person that she will be and all of the things that we can't wait to do with her.  So exciting!
• Planning the nursery and buying baby stuff- This goes without an explanation!  I'm a girl and it's fun!
• Feeling her move- This is the closest that she and I will ever be.  Feeling her move around in me and knowing that we are already creating this Mother-Daughter bond has been life changing.  At first, I didn't know what to think because I wasn't sure that was actually her moving around in there.  But, every day, she has gotten stronger and stronger and it has been such a miracle to witness.  I absolutely loved the day that Joe felt her move and then, felt pure joy the day that he could see her move (kinda weird and sci-fi but very cool!).
• The anticipation-  I have loved counting down!  One of my favorite things to do is read to Joe weekly about the progress of our little bean.  I can't wait to meet her but am relishing in this moment of our lives where we can be as idealistic as we want!  Right now, we can talk all we want about being the perfect parents and our plans on how to raise her.  We will be ready when she gets here (at least as ready as we'll ever be) but for now, I'm enjoying this part too!

 

27 week "bump" (if we can still call it that!)... Hubs is in the field, so I had to resort to the old mirror-self-pic... Not my fave but it gets the job done :)

New Mommy Thoughts for a New Year

I know that I am fifteen days late but... Happy New Year! 

As my lack of blogging shows, life for the Daugherty family has been a bit busy and chaotic.  For the holidays, we spent nearly three weeks traveling from California to Houston to Lafayette, back to Houston, then to Killeen, Tx, and finally to Dallas before making the long way home.  Needless to say, Christmas was not a time of relaxation but we were able to see all of our family members, have two beautiful baby showers (thanks to some amazing family and friends), and even made it to a football game where we saw the Aggies beat Oklahoma.  Not quiet and relaxing but very fun.

I thought that maybe things would start to slow down once we were home but when we returned with all of this baby stuff and ONLY fifteen weeks until sweet little Adaline makes her debut (yes, I hear the ridiculousness of this statement), my nesting abilities have kicked into full gear and I have thrown myself into prepping for our addition.  I know that there is time but I have this incredible urge to get everything done NOW... just in case she decides to show up earlier than planned.  Again, not quiet and relaxing but very fun.

For most of my adult life, I have taken each New Year as an opportunity to reflect upon my growth from the previous year and think about what worked, what didn't, and what I felt absolutely needed to change.  I take New Year's resolutions very seriously and contemplate on my goals for the New Year before writing them all down and posting them on my bathroom mirror.  Of  course, there are always a couple of typical resolutions: lose 10 pounds, run a half-marathon, etc. but I always make sure to include things about my personal growth as well.  This year, with motherhood in the very near future, these kinds of resolutions seem to be more important than ever.

Before we got pregnant, maybe before we even started trying, I'd always say that between having a boy and a girl, I definitely wanted a boy.  In my mind, raising boys seemed like a much easier task (and mommies of boys, please do not be offended with this statement.  Parenting seems to be a difficult task all around).  You teach boys right vs. wrong, keep them occupied with sports and activities, make sure they do their homework and learn the importance of hard work, and for the most part, you can pretty much guarantee that your boy will grow up to be a man that you will be proud of.    

Girls are so much more difficult.  First of all, there are all of the emotions and hormones that are involved.  Good Lord.  My poor momma had to deal with two girls and I'm sure there were times when she wanted to hide in the closet because my sister and I were p.m.s.ing at the same time.  On top of the emotions, add all of the character building that is needed to produce a good, strong woman in today's society: building self esteem but not so much self esteem that she thinks she's better than everyone around her; the need for teaching independence, along with a balance of accepting help when needed;  confidence for her to state her opinions and believe in her convictions but not too closed minded so that she doesn't learn from others; the importance of empathy and sensitivity but not too much sensitivity that will impede her own progress.  The list goes on and on. 

So, what happened?  God chuckled and blessed me with a daughter.  :)

I've taken enough Child Psychology and Child Development classes to know that some of these qualities are simply genetics.  Another large part of a child's personality and development is due to role modeling... which brings me back to my New Year's Resolutions.

As I started to do my self reflection for this year, I noticed things there that I would never want my daughter to learn from me, much less feel herself.  The biggest one being my sensitivity which has increased and my self-esteem which has decreased since we have decided for me to stay at home.  I honestly feel that this was the best decision for me and my family.  There will be sacrifices that will have to be made in the future but for both me and my husband, having a little less money seems like a small price to pay when we have a peaceful, healthy, and loving marriage and children that feel loved and taken care of. 

The doubt of my self-worth stems from the (very few) people who think that now that I'm not working at a "real" job, that I have lost all of my credibility and am basically sitting at home, watching soap operas, and eating bonbons all day.  This drives me nuts.  I can't help but feel defensive and get this incredible urge to print up my resume, put it in my purse, and whip it out to prove that yes, I am still educated and have done some pretty fantastic things in my little life. 
But, then it dawned on me (after a complete bitch-session with my wonderful husband) that the opinions of these people doesn't mean diddly-squat and that this decision was made because it is what we felt was right. 

Not too long ago, my sister shared a quote on Facebook that talked about being a mom.  It basically said that any decision that you make as a mother, whether you decide to work full-time, go back to school, stay at home, choose to breastfeed or bottle feed, use reusable diapers or disposable... some one will always be there to judge you.  So, mothers should ignore these people and do what they feel is right because that's all that can really be done.    

Why is it that we naturally focus our attention on the nay-sayers instead of the huge crowd that is cheering for us the whole way???  This year, I choose to listen to that huge crowd, follow my heart in what I feel is best for my family, and feel confident in that decision.  Because, for me, that is one of the greatest lessons that I hope to one day teach my daughter.