Running Girl

Back in 2006, I started running.  Let me clarify... I started in my attempt to run.  There were a whole bunch of reasons to start this little activity:  I was getting a little older and my size 4 was beginning to become a bit harder to maintain; I wanted a healthier lifestyle; I needed a way to get out my frustrations; but, the main reason was that when I mentioned wanting to do a race at some point in my life, my ex laughed, said I wasn't athletic, and that it was never going to happen...

The best ammunition ever.

If you know anything about me, you know that I am not competitive... maybe when it comes to board games but that's about it.  I don't have an athletic bone in my body.  I never worked out during High School because I preferred practicing for Speech (yes, I am that kind of nerd).  And, I enjoy eating and drinking probably a little too much (this I blame entirely on being from Louisiana).  But, you also know that if you tell me that I'm not going to do something, then you sure as hell better believe that I will prove you wrong.

So, I started slowly. For the longest time, I'd run about a mile or two and think how fantastic I was becoming.  Then, I started looking into races.  5k's seemed too short, so I made the goal of running my first 10k.  I knew it wasn't much and that for veteran runners, it was kind of a joke.  But for me, the determination that I felt and the time that I put into training made crossing my first finish line the most amazing experience ever.

I was hooked...

After that, running wasn't about proving someone wrong anymore.  It had taken on a whole new personal meaning.  It didn't matter that I wasn't athletic.  I knew that I would never finish first in a race and I really didn't care.  It didn't matter how long it took or what I looked like.  Just the fact that I was out there, sweating my ass off, looking like the complete klutz that I was, was enough for me (as long as I didn't trip and fall while running, I was fine).

The more miles that I gained, the happier I was.  In my head, I was jumping up and down, doing a happy dance while I ran, complete with leaps and very excited arm gestures.  On the outside, I probably looked like I was dying: huffing, puffing, sweating, and being quite near to collapsing.  The thing is, is that it didn't matter.

So, I made the really ambitious goal of running a marathon before I turned 30.  Note, that was nearly six years ago... I had all of the time in the world!!!  I never realized that 30 would be just around the corner.

And here I am now... with a year to train and get this thing done.  I know that I don't have to do it... it was a goal that was made by a very naive young woman who had no idea what it felt like to run even half of a marathon.  And frankly, it scares the shit out of me.  When I thought that I sucked at running at 23... well, let's just say that I haven't become any more athletic over the years.  Running is still hard.  I still need to take breaks.  I still find it difficult to stay motivated.  But, I can't help but think, if running this marathon is one of the hardest things that I do in my life... then maybe everything will seem a little bit easier after that...

Wishful thinking?  Maybe.  I guess we will just have to see!